The outspoken editor of Cosmopolitan magazine, Helen Gurley Brown, reports  at 64 she has found that "Age is a careless jailer.  There are hours, days, even weeks, when it doesn't seem to check up on you."

A person can respond to age two ways, she continues, "By being depressed and hiding out, or by doing the best you can with what is left of your life."

Women who turn 40 today have a lot more going for them than those who reached that milestone a generation ago.  They are more likely to still have young children at home, having started their families later than their mothers did. 

Because so many of them work outside the home, they have wide range of interests and activities in addition to their home life.  While mom may have agonized over what she would do when the kids left home, today's woman is more likely to wish them well and then to launch a new career or concentrate on putting the romance back into her marriage.  Today's woman has learned that reaching 40 does not signal  the end to her satisfying sex life.  Mid-life crisis isn't even in her vocabulary.

CHANGES...NOT CATASTROPHES

During the middle years, there are, in fact, a significant number of physiological changes that take place in a woman's body.  Some can be modified; some can be controlled; but none can be avoided altogether.  The important thing is to realize which is which.

Since no one has found the Fountain of Youth, there is no magic formula to ward off aging.  While science continues its search for the genes that decide how people age, we know that to a large extent how a person ages is strongly influenced by some controllable lifestyle factors: exposure to sunlight; whether or not they smoke; whether or not they exercise and eat well; how they handle stress; and their outlook on life.

SEXUALITY

If sex has been an important and enjoyable part of your life during your younger years, there is no reason to expect it to change because you have suddenly crossed an arbitrary age barrier. 

From a purely physical standpoint, the potential for sexual enjoyment increases with age.  Practical experience has its benefits, too.  Inhibitions often disappear once she is liberated from the fear of pregnancy.  With the nest empty, there may be more time for leisurely lovemaking.

There are many more things involved other than estrogen when it comes to female sexuality.  An active interest in sex has as much to do with a good mental attitude as it does with hormones.  It is hard to feel sexy, for example,  when you're worried about an aging parent, an adult child's divorce, or how to meet escalating household bills.

There are also some physical changes that take place that can, if ignored, interfere with sex.  Both the uterus and cervix shrink in size and vaginal secretions that provide lubrication during intercourse decrease.  This can usually be solved with a water-soluble, non-petroleum based lubricant available without prescription.

Menopause does not affect a woman's ability to have an orgasm, although for some the duration or intensity may  somewhat decrease. An old myth has turned out to be true.  Research conducted by Masters and Johnson confirmed (somewhat indelicately) that "if you don't use it, you lose it."

They concluded that regular sexual activity (at least once or twice each week) seems to keep the vagina moist and elastic, and can eliminate problems with uterine cramping during orgasm.

The most important ingredient for a healthy sex life after 40 is unquestionably good communication with your spouse.  As physical changes occur or obstacles are encountered (lack of arousal, impotence, failure to reach climax) a candid and open discussion may be the best medicine.